08-06-2006, 08:35 AM
You didn't read the subject line ?
I did. You are confused and don't understand context. You said "your post starts off extremely confrontational", but who is the "post" confronting? Nobody. Buzz is obviously upset, but he's confronting nobody, just providing background and asking advice, via post. You're somehow inferring confrontation.
He then goes on to claim he's all ready confronted the neighbor with his concerns.
He does? Where is that stated? Again, you assumed, inferred, or misread. He may have, but that wasn't his claim.
empathizers, it gets you a lot further in life
No, "sympathizers" was accurate for my purposes. This applies to those who are not smokers as well as those who are.
it seems you've found the answer to an earlier question
Again, you've come to an incorrect conclusion. See above.
Doctors try "tough love" including refusing care and treatment to those that smoke. It doesn't work.
So do Dentists.
Parents try it with kids , it rarely works. They sure do think they've fooled you into thinking it has though.
Ok. But for Buzz, this isn't a matter of "tough love". It's not up to him or the other tenants to provide care and treatment to those who smoke. The guy isn't Buzz's patient or child.
Compassion and consideration for others is a good thing. SP is considerate enough not to smoke in his roommate's abode. I don't know if compassion has anything to do with it, or what his specific considerations are. But he doesn't seem to be extending like consideration to his neighbors.
Pam's method works. It takes a LOT more effort and patience.
Well, it certainly *can* work, in appropriate circumstances. *IF* the guy is considerate, a kind word could/should have done the trick. According to Buzz, the guy has moved into another category.
If Buzz was dealing with a family member or good friend, maybe long term effort and patience would be in order. This is a tenant.
- - - -
I thought billb's post was the most reasonable in this thread.
Of course you did. We disagree.
How bizarre that you should choose to tear it to shreds piece by piece.
I disagreed with much of his interpretation of and response to Buzz's post, and posted my opinion to some points. How bizarre that you chose to try to characterize and spin that as "tearing it to shreds, piece by piece".
Don't be such a drama queen.
BTW soma=body==> pyschosOmatic.
You found a mistake. I always appreciate constructive edification.
- - - - -
Buzz, sorry to hear that the manager and management company will be of little or no help.
Leaving notes under the windshield wiper probably won't accomplish much at this point, but adhesive stickers (even on the windshield) may be vandalism, in your area.
Fighting fire with fire isn't usually productive, and is rarely constructive.
My last suggestion would be to have upset neighbors write the company, via Certified Mail. Staying on the backs of the management company looks like your best bet. This assumes you know that he is in fact violating a smoke-free zone.
Or you could pay small children to approach him and sweetly sing "You're killing yourself with your smoking, la la lala la!"
If that doesn't work, they could run around, surrounding him screaming and shrieking "You're killing us with your smoking! We want to live! We want to live!" every time they see him.
Oh, and call a local news film crew.
I did. You are confused and don't understand context. You said "your post starts off extremely confrontational", but who is the "post" confronting? Nobody. Buzz is obviously upset, but he's confronting nobody, just providing background and asking advice, via post. You're somehow inferring confrontation.
He then goes on to claim he's all ready confronted the neighbor with his concerns.
He does? Where is that stated? Again, you assumed, inferred, or misread. He may have, but that wasn't his claim.
empathizers, it gets you a lot further in life
No, "sympathizers" was accurate for my purposes. This applies to those who are not smokers as well as those who are.
it seems you've found the answer to an earlier question
Again, you've come to an incorrect conclusion. See above.
Doctors try "tough love" including refusing care and treatment to those that smoke. It doesn't work.
So do Dentists.
Parents try it with kids , it rarely works. They sure do think they've fooled you into thinking it has though.
Ok. But for Buzz, this isn't a matter of "tough love". It's not up to him or the other tenants to provide care and treatment to those who smoke. The guy isn't Buzz's patient or child.
Compassion and consideration for others is a good thing. SP is considerate enough not to smoke in his roommate's abode. I don't know if compassion has anything to do with it, or what his specific considerations are. But he doesn't seem to be extending like consideration to his neighbors.
Pam's method works. It takes a LOT more effort and patience.
Well, it certainly *can* work, in appropriate circumstances. *IF* the guy is considerate, a kind word could/should have done the trick. According to Buzz, the guy has moved into another category.
If Buzz was dealing with a family member or good friend, maybe long term effort and patience would be in order. This is a tenant.
- - - -
I thought billb's post was the most reasonable in this thread.
Of course you did. We disagree.
How bizarre that you should choose to tear it to shreds piece by piece.
I disagreed with much of his interpretation of and response to Buzz's post, and posted my opinion to some points. How bizarre that you chose to try to characterize and spin that as "tearing it to shreds, piece by piece".
Don't be such a drama queen.
BTW soma=body==> pyschosOmatic.
You found a mistake. I always appreciate constructive edification.
- - - - -
Buzz, sorry to hear that the manager and management company will be of little or no help.
Leaving notes under the windshield wiper probably won't accomplish much at this point, but adhesive stickers (even on the windshield) may be vandalism, in your area.
Fighting fire with fire isn't usually productive, and is rarely constructive.
My last suggestion would be to have upset neighbors write the company, via Certified Mail. Staying on the backs of the management company looks like your best bet. This assumes you know that he is in fact violating a smoke-free zone.
Or you could pay small children to approach him and sweetly sing "You're killing yourself with your smoking, la la lala la!"
If that doesn't work, they could run around, surrounding him screaming and shrieking "You're killing us with your smoking! We want to live! We want to live!" every time they see him.
Oh, and call a local news film crew.