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mrbigstuff, it's a big deal right now if I can get up off the bed and walk to the bathroom.
A short time ago I was much stronger, but suddenly I relapsed and I don't know why.
Needless to say, I feel terribly frustrated.
One issue that I have is my driver's license has expired and it will be difficult, without assistance, to get to the DMV, much less to make an appointment.
If I manage that then I will be faced with finding a suitable vehicle that runs well and I can afford. That was one thing that led me to ask about a "go fund me."
You can tell how tough it is for me without a network of friends and family that could pitch in and assist me in getting back on my feet.
Oh well...!
... at least I will have a room to myself.
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GeneL wrote:
mrbigstuff, it's a big deal right now if I can get up off the bed and walk to the bathroom.
A short time ago I was much stronger, but suddenly I relapsed and I don't know why.
Needless to say, I feel terribly frustrated.
One issue that I have is my driver's license has expired and it will be difficult, without assistance, to get to the DMV, much less to make an appointment.
If I manage that then I will be faced with finding a suitable vehicle that runs well and I can afford. That was one thing that led me to ask about a "go fund me."
You can tell how tough it is for me without a network of friends and family that could pitch in and assist me in getting back on my feet.
Oh well...!
... at least I will have a room to myself.
Here are a couple of resources in Dana Point.
Age Well Senior Services Non - Emergency Medical Transportation - $2.00 per Ride - Call
(949) 855-9766 for information and application.
Age Well Senior Services’ Non-Emergency Medical Transportation program provides seniors with transportation to their non-emergency medical appointments including therapy, dentistry, hearing, dialysis, prescription pick-ups, testing and x-rays. Professionally trained drivers provide transportation on our modern fleet of accessible buses and vans.
[I’ve used a similar service in my area with tremendous success.]
Case Management - Free home assessment to determine the level of assistance needed to help maintain senior's independence. By appointment, call (949) 496-9519.
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Glad to hear that you have a place to go. I too would be suspicious of daughter's intent. Perhaps if you're away from Mavis for a while, Mavis might have time to give SERIOUS consideration to what SHE wants and what will be best for HER. Do you know if Mavis has ever consulted with an attorney; especially one familiar with elder care issues? If she hasn't, she REALLY should (but, such a recommendation would be better if it didn't come from you).
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Hey Gene!
I was going to suggest Uber for moving around. I realize it can get expensive, but it may be useful for you once in a while.
But Blankity’s info is pure gold. Call them ASAP!!!
Rooting for you here.
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Another big plus over an Uber/Lyft is, with our service, the drivers were tasked with transporting those with health issues and are remarkably accommodating.
All the way from simply walking you to the door to make sure you have no difficulties, to carrying (a reasonable number of) bags to your door, helping you up steps, etc. They aren’t full blown caretakers, but they do go out of their way far more than any Uber driver I’ve come across (to the contrary, I could tell you a couple of less than pleasant stories on that front).
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Thanks everyone, for the ongoing support.
I certainly am a "work in progress."
I have been fortunate to have qualified for Medical transportation. It is free for me and will take me to my medical appointments, including dialysis three days a week. The only issue that I have with them is that sometimes they run late, which can be a problem with my getting my full 3 to 3 1/2 hours of dialysis treatment.
testcase, I agree that Mavis should be talking to an attorney that specializes in this type of case. Unfortunately, she has it in her head that it would precipitate some terrible action on the part of her daughter. The daughter's husband has a large successful business, so Mavis feels that they would crush her attempts to bring an attorney into the situation.
She won't listen to my suggestion.
As far as transportation is concerned, my biggest need is to get around so I can deal with all the saleable items that I have left at the condo. Getting to the DMV has me stumped. Once I would have my license I think that I would be able to get something to drive.
Which brings me back to an original point, is there some way that I could raise some money?
Thanks for the ongoing support. I just would be happy if some of it involved face to face interaction! It would be great to sit down with my forum friends and have a cup of coffee while we figure out how to deal with my challenges.
I'm sure you can get how I feel...
Thanks again, everyone.
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GeneL wrote:
... testcase, I agree that Mavis should be talking to an attorney that specializes in this type of case. Unfortunately, she has it in her head that it would precipitate some terrible action on the part of her daughter. The daughter's husband has a large successful business, so Mavis feels that they would crush her attempts to bring an attorney into the situation.
She won't listen to my suggestion.
...
What was the suggestion, to sue the daughter for some reason? If not, how/why would the daughter "crush" her?
The only suggestion I recall anyone making was for Mavis to tell the daughter to simply take a hike and let Mavis do whatever Mavis wants to do.
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deckeda wrote:
[quote=GeneL]
... testcase, I agree that Mavis should be talking to an attorney that specializes in this type of case. Unfortunately, she has it in her head that it would precipitate some terrible action on the part of her daughter. The daughter's husband has a large successful business, so Mavis feels that they would crush her attempts to bring an attorney into the situation.
She won't listen to my suggestion.
...
What was the suggestion, to sue the daughter for some reason? If not, how/why would the daughter "crush" her?
The only suggestion I recall anyone making was for Mavis to tell the daughter to simply take a hike and let Mavis do whatever Mavis wants to do.
Mavis is terrified. Unfortunately, terrified people don't respond well to reason.
Mavis can consult a lawyer without telling her daughter, and following the lawyer's advice would not necessarily involve a lawsuit. But Mavis is too terrified to wrap her head around these nuances.
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Janit, you have a clear sense of the situation. It is so frustrating for me, not to be able to encourage Mavis to get herself a knowledgeable lawyer to set up something that would provide solid protection against anything that her daughter might do.
Instead she builds a case in her mind that she loses her grandchildren and her great grandchildren if she involves a lawyer. She sees that the daughter who has been attacking her has involved her daughters and their husbands in businesses that in some way depend on her and her businessman husband.
She feels that there is nothing she can do that won't backfire on her.
Then, as far as our relationship, she feels that because she bought the condo and pays the various utilities she has contributed much more to the relationship than I have and she has expressed that viewpoint many times in the past. It has always been hurtful when she has done that.
The truth is that I have many times wanted to chip in with the money that I have coming in, but she has always rejected my offer. It has always seemed to be her way to prevent me from establishing a claim against her.
I have shrugged this off, not knowing anyway to change her.
People talk about "sweat equity" and between that and the money that I have spent on food, entertainment, various additions to the condo and all the "honey do" things that I have done to keep things running, I feel that I have kept up my end of things but Mavis discounts all of that!
I just don't know how I can move on? I have no picture of recovering a life from this horrific situation and being able to find "someone new."
Pretty sad, huh?
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Yesterday two things happened.
Mavis called me all upset. When she went to get the WSJ which is delivered to our front door each morning, she found an envelope that contained a letter from her daughter.
The daughter apologized for her verbal attack and suggested that they work to have a better relationship.
Mavis expressed her feelings, saying that she didn't feel that she could trust her daughter.
I had, initially, taken the letter as a sign that Mavis could let me come home. Unfortunately, she felt that she couldn't trust the letter.
When I heard about the letter I had taken it as a sign that I wouldn't have to rent the room that very afternoon, but Mavis burst that bubble with ongoing distrust of her daughter.
That afternoon I took a Lyft over to see the room and it wasn't bad. I had been apprehensive about the size (10x10) thinking "prison cell" but it turned out to be quite pleasant. I will have to make the most of it.
My biggest concern right now is that I am not feeling very well. I just am keeping my fingers crossed that my health and my strength will improve over time.
On my way to dialysis right now, so consider this my update.
Thanks,
GeneL
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