Need advice on dealing with a neighbor (LONG)

[kap]

Last week I posted about a fall out between me and the block loud and obnoxious across the street neighbor who cannot drink without getting drunk. He jokingly threatened me, i.e. "there is a hole and shovel with your name on it in my backyard.", "I'd kick your ass if I was a violent person.", and "I'd call the police on you." Instead, I called the police on him first. Each of us were told to completely cut off contact with each other or we'd be arrested. So we did. A few days ago he came to a neighboring couple, who live next door to us, to let them know that he wanted to give up his dog, a senior mutt he's adopted for merely two months. The couple neighbor asked me if we were willing to take the dog. We'd agreed with conditions: The couple neighbor must adopt the dog first. Then transfer the ownership to us. We simple didn't want to have anything to do with L&O (loud and obnoxious) one. But then when L&O found out the plan he refused to be a part of it. We were alright with that. Yesterday afternoon, I got a phone message from the wife telling me that the L&O would approach me regarding the dog. And he did as I was parking my car on the side of my street. I told him to that I couldn't talk to him because of the police's order. He pleaded to speak to me. I kept telling him that neither of us should or we' be hauled down the station. He said, "only if we were to have a fight." He kept apologizing and insisting that we needed to talk about the adoption of the dog; he did not want to fight; it was just a misunderstanding; he's been going through the divorce from his alcoholic wife hence it's been difficult, etc. We shook hand agreeing that we'd try again; I would have a try-out with the dog. As far as my feeling for him. Things have changed. I don't care much for being friendly with him any more. I'll be civil but that is all. I don't trust that he will not act up again. He has a history in the neighborhood to have verbal altercations with others. Of course, my S/O advised against the whole idea. She thinks that the next time the police will not take my complaint seriously. I just feel sorry for the dog. What do y'all think?

[modelamac]

You should have held your ground and not talked to him. That police order has been violated, and you have lost your standing from their point of view.

The problem is that your "nice" neighbors spilled the whole story instead of just saying they'd try keeping the dog for a while. Why? Asinine!

[The UnDoug]

Personally--and just based on the little understanding of the whole situation that I get from reading your post--I would not have wanted to be "intertwined" with him in any way. Taking in his former dog--even if done through a neighbor--is getting involved with him.

Why would you put your feelings for the dog above your own safety?

[space-time]

don't get involved in any way. forget about the neighbor, forget about the dog.

[kap]

I have talked over the situation more thoroughly afterwards with S/O and she thought it was not a good idea especially where the police's order is concerned. I agreed. So I will have to somehow let L&O know that we are no longer interested in wanting the dog. Man, that might just tick him off! I sure don't need the stress. Should I contact the police? What are the most logical steps from here on?

BTW, I did not want to talk to him but he was standing right next to the door. I couldn't get out of the car. I had to tell him that I couldn't talk to him but he was persistent. I ended up having to say something in order to get out of the car. This whole this is really upsetting now. If I didn't have a heart for his dog. Damn, I regret now :[

[Lux Interior]

[quote kap]What are the most logical steps from here on?
1) Pack up
2) Move

[Chupa Chupa]

1) Unless there is an outstanding court order, the police cannot arrest you for mere association with another person unless a crime was committed.

2) There is a dog at risk here (which is why you got involved in the first place).

I understand your trepidation to deal direct with the L&O though, and I think your original solution, to obtain the dog via a straw man, i.e., your neighbors, was a good one. Why not tell the neighbors to tell L&O that is how you want to proceed, and that there is to be no contact between you and L&O and leave it at that. That way you don't potentially exacerbate an explosive relationship, and you also have a witness to your actions, should that be needed in the future.

[kap]

Lux,
We are in the process of moving to another home in the nearby city IF the new house is available by the end of July.

Chupa,
He has lots of police complaints filed by other neighbors. I don't know if any of those is an outstanding court order. One thing for sure he is afraid of losing the custody of his two boys due to on-going divorce process.

As previously mentioned, I feel bad for the dog but I don't want to risk my and my family safety because of my concern for an animal.

Regarding the 'nice' neighbors, I don't think they want to be in the middle even though both feel bad for the dog as well.

[Chupa Chupa]

[quote kap]
He has lots of police complaints filed by other neighbors. I don't know if any of those is an outstanding court order.
You have petition the court and show cause why it should grant a restraining order. Typically courts don't issue them without a hearing with all parties present. So if neither of you were in court, there is no restraining order between the two of you.

[OWC Jamie]

A lot <> for you to stay completely uninvolved.
<>or at least headed for rock bottom, you really don't want to be there. A brother or relative, maybe. Someone who will spit on you the next time he has a bottle in his hand - not.
The police want you to stay away because they know this guy is spiralling down, they've seen it way too many times before.
These situations tend to escalate (usually when they're having a busy night), they don't want to have to come back either.
I wouldn't talk to him anywhere but at the end of my driveway. Only if he was completely sober.
I'd also be prepared to find him drunk as a skunk, sitting on your front steps looking for a fight, over something you said or did three weeks ago, now completely out of context.
Be careful , at least.